I’ve come to realize that I live my life in two truths. I can never just pick one.
Take my hair, for example.
Earlier this week, I went for a haircut and came home missing approximately a year of hair growth. I was not happy. I had given very explicit instructions with a photo of what I wanted. Apparently that was not enough evidence for the hairdresser. I walked out less than pleased. That was Tuesday.
I woke up this morning and I decided I actually like my hair. Quite a lot, in fact.
Does that mean the hairdresser was right? Absolutely not.
I can believe she cut it too short and still think I look fabulous. Both things are true, and I see no reason to pick one.
I’ve realized I do this with just about everything.
I love being a teacher. After over thirty years, I also occasionally wonder how I’ve managed to spend so much of my adult life surrounded by teenagers asking questions whose answers are on the board directly in front of them. Although they are hand written, which is a whole different problem.
I love people. Well, certain people. Sometimes. Under very special circumstances. I also find humanity absolutely exhausting.
I love my independence, and I love having someone to share my life with. I can be grateful for what I have and still grieve what I’ve lost. I can be happy about where I am and wish some things had turned out differently.
For a long time, I thought I was supposed to choose. That one feeling had to be more correct than the other. That if I was grateful, I shouldn’t complain. If I was happy, I shouldn’t be sad. If I loved something, I shouldn’t occasionally want to run away.
But that’s never really been how life works for me.
So I’m calling this little corner of my writing Two Truths.
A place for the things that exist together, even when they are clearly in opposition. The funny ones, the uncomfortable ones, and the ones that take a little longer to admit.
I don’t promise to resolve any of them and I am not convinced they need resolving.
And just for the record, I still think she cut my hair too short.
